


Axel Doesn't Know Everything: A work in three parts.

by kinomatics



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Axel is bad at the words, Boys Kissing, Confessions, Love Confessions, M/M, Mentions of Demyx/Zexion, Nobodies with feelings, no betas we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-02
Updated: 2018-02-02
Packaged: 2019-03-12 13:58:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13548792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kinomatics/pseuds/kinomatics
Summary: Roxas has questions about love and Axel explains everything badly.





	Axel Doesn't Know Everything: A work in three parts.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SexiestSwine (Mitaki1812)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mitaki1812/gifts).



> I haven't written or posted anything in like 8 years. Please, be gentle :)
> 
> Disclaimer: I've really only played the first Kingdom Hearts, part of Chains, and Days so I'm not super familiar with this game series.

**_i._ **

 

Axel paused mid-lick of his ice cream, “What?”

 

Roxas shrugged and repeated the question. “I know Nobodies don’t have hearts and we can't feel things like humans can, but every time we hang out like this, I get this feeling in my chest. It's super weird and I was wondering if you knew anything about what it could be?”

 

To be honest, Axel had been wondering that himself. He’d never brought it up because it honestly worried him a little bit. What had originally been an excuse to not return to the castle and spite Saïx a bit had turned more into a daily routine. It was alien now **not** to meet up with Roxas at the top of the clock tower for their daily ice cream chats. Axel couldn’t put a name to whatever it was that was making his chest feel tight and his stomach queasy whenever Roxas was around.

 

Still, even though he felt like he _knew_ the sensation his companion was talking about, he didn't have an answer for him and he just shrugged it off. “Maybe you're sick? I mean besides the usual sick.” he joked. Roxas just rolled his eyes.

 

“I'm being serious here and you're making jokes!”

 

Axel turned a bit to face Roxas, who was now mopily looking at the town laid out before them, “Well maybe it’s…” he trailed off, thinking hard about whether he really wanted to finish the sentence. It was something he’d heard about before, “...maybe it's love?”

 

“Love?” he heard the confused lilt in Roxas’s voice and he was ready to just fling himself off this tower. He was not qualified to answer _that_ question. Honestly he wasn't qualified to answer any kind of questions.

 

“Uh….yeah. Love. It's like friendship but super strong. Like…” he was crashing and burning here, “A best friend.  That's what I meant it's like having a super best friend. A best friend that you're super close to I guess.”

 

“Like how Demyx and Zexion call each other their ‘best bro’ and stuff? Is that what you mean?”

 

Axel nodded even though he knew it wasn't the same thing. What Demyx and Zexion had going on together was way different from what he was describing. Still if it helped this awkward conversation end quicker.

 

“Yeah it's like that. They're such good friends with each other that they think of each other more like brothers than just friends.” _That is so gross Axel and you know it._ “So they’re super close like that. It's basically love. Got it memorized?”

 

Roxas shrugged, “Still a bit confused on it but I guess it kind of makes sense the way you explained it. Does this mean that you're my best friend?”

 

Axel chuckled, “Yeah of course we're best friends. You think I come here everyday just for the ice cream? I come here to hang out with you buddy.”

 

That answer seemed to do it for Roxas, who gave Axel his trademark wide and bright smile before going back to his ice cream, which was starting to melt down his gloves.

 

Axel felt his chest tighten again at the sight of that smile and that's when he knew he was **_doomed._ **

 

 _**ii.** _  


If Axel hated anything, it was being woken up before he did it himself. A stream of curses sprung to his lips but when he caught sight of Roxas looking down at him, he had to bite his tongue to keep them down.

 

“Axel I know you hate being woken up and all, especially on a day off but I have something I _have_ to ask you.”

 

Normally, yes, Axel would hate being woken up by anyone and on a rare vacation day to boot. This wasn't anyone though. It was Roxas who up until a minute ago had been the subject of what some might have viewed as a very lewd dream.

 

Since that day on the clock tower, Axel had been having strange dreams. Whatever that tightness in his chest was had simply grown stronger the more time he spent with Roxas and now it was following him into his dreams. They'd started innocent enough. Just the two of them chilling at the tower like everyday.

 

Then one night, in the dream, Roxas had been sitting uncomfortably close to him. He could feel his chest pounding and his hands were sweaty inside his gloves. It seemed like the more time dragged, the closer Roxas got to him. Eventually, he could feel a hand rubbing up the top of his thigh and when he finally managed to take a look, Roxas’ hand was damn near in his lap. Bringing his eyes to Roxas’, there was an unholy smirk that rivaled his own and he suddenly woke tangled in sweaty sheets. Not to mention an unpleasant tightness in his pajama bottoms.

 

The dream he’d just woken from was similar to that one, but he much preferred the real Roxas to a dream one. He had a bit of a downstairs issue as well but nothing a conveniently placed bundle of blankets couldn’t fix.

 

“What’s up Rox? What was so important that you had to disrupt my slumber?”

 

Roxas opened his mouth but nothing came out, and Axel couldn’t help but look down at his lips. Those pink, sinfully shaped lips of his that had been up to some very, very dirty things in Axel’s head. The only thing pinker than those lips had to be Roxas’s face, flushed like he was embarrassed about something.

 

“Well uh...I was headed out. I was going to go into town a bit and just you know...wander around? Well I forgot my munny bag in my room so I went back to get it and I ran into Demyx and Zexion… but they were kissing in the hallway.”

 

_Oh._

 

Demyx and Zexion being a ‘thing’ wasn’t really a secret in the Organization. In fact they weren’t really even that much to be honest. Sometimes you just needed a sense of personal relief that isn’t your own right hand. At least, Axel believed that’s what that was because that’s what Zexion had insisted it was and Axel was content to not press any further.

 

But Roxas didn’t have a clue. He was new to all of this and he was certainly new to _that_ and now because those two couldn’t keep it in their robes for a second to get back to a room, Axel was going to have to explain it.

 

“Yeah those two… wow right there in the hallway huh?” Axel rubbed his face, trying to wake up a bit before explaining this.

 

“At least I think it was kissing. It was almost like they were stuck together at the mouth.”

 

“Oh you caught them in one of their little make-out sessions huh?” Axel chuckled to himself, thinking about times he’d caught them going at much worse, “Yeah they tend to do that. You came all the way here to tell me that?”

 

“Well...what is it? What’s a make-out?” Roxas asked and Axel was not prepared for that question.

 

Axel was not prepared for a lot of Roxas’s questions apparently.

 

“Um, Well…it’s basically kissing but messier. It’s longer and there’s a lot of open mouth contact.” He’d never had to explain this before. Why was it so hard to explain but so easy to do? “You uh...you usually do it with someone you really like?”

 

Roxas nodded his head like he understood, “Like someone you love?”

 

Open mouth, insert foot.

 

“Kind of. Look it’s going to come as a surprise I know, but I don’t really know everything. Some things you just kinda...do on instinct. Like your keyblade for instance. No one tells you how to summon it or how to use it, you just do. Same with love and making out and stuff. You just kinda go on instinct.”

 

Roxas scrunched his forehead in thought, “So being in love with someone, being someone’s best friend like they are and we are, means you make-out?”

 

Axel couldn’t take the conversation anymore. He was just digging himself into a deeper and deeper hole, and right now he needed to get out of it before he was stuck, “Not really, they’re something different. One is more emotion based, but we’re Nobodies and we don’t have emotions so it doesn’t apply to us…” At least, he thought it didn’t.

 

These last few times around Roxas had him rethinking his position on this. He had to be feeling some kind of an emotion, this couldn’t just be a coincidence. It hadn’t been here before Roxas came, but now it was taking up his whole life.

 

He needed to do some more research because stuff wasn’t adding up, “You know Rox, I don’t think this is something I have the answer to. It’s shocking I know, but sometimes it happens. However, since I’m now awake, I think I’m going to take the opportunity to go check out that new world that Saïx has been talking about. Those other two should be out of your way by now, so you should be clear to grab your munny.” Axel said in an almost desperate attempt to get Roxas out of his room.

 

“I was just going to wander around Twilight Town...maybe I’ll come with you instead.” Roxas said cheerfully and, again, flashing one of those bright smiles of his that never seemed to fail to make Axel’s chest hurt.

 

He simply nodded and accepted that today was just going to be one of those days...hopefully without resuming the talk of what a make-out was and how badly Axel wanted to do it with Roxas.

 

**_iii._ **

 

“I’ve been reading up on love.”

 

Axel knew that this conversation would come up again. That’s how things usually were with Roxas. Once he got a thought in his head, it’s what normally overtook their conversations for about a month and this one was going on a bit longer then he liked. This topic hadn’t been brought up for a while but here it was again, rearing its head back to Axel, who was again unprepared.

 

“And just where have you been reading about this riveting subject?” Axel asked. They were at the clocktower again, like they were every day. They’d considered getting another flavor of ice cream today, but why mess with a tried and true favorite?

 

It was an unusually hot day today, and because he hated having to do laundry, Axel had taken his gloves off to eat the frozen treat. Roxas had followed his lead in doing the same, but because the boy was such a slow eater all he’d succeeded in doing was getting ice cream drippings all over his hands. Axel felt a bit guilty watching as Roxas licked his hands of the blue drips, but for reasons unbeknownst to him, he couldn’t turn away.

 

“The castle library. I’ve never seen so many books in my life so I figured maybe the answers to just what Love was could be in there.” Roxas said, taking a bite out of his ice cream, “I found a dictionary that said Love was something that came from strong personal ties with another person.”

 

Axel shrugged his shoulders, “Yeah that’s basically what I told you it was. I’m almost hurt that you didn’t believe me.”

 

“It had another sentence though, that love is something strong felt by people who have romantic feelings for one another. All that did was give me more questions because I didn’t really find anything about ‘romantic’ in the dictionary that didn’t already deal with love. I was running circles in a book.” Roxas groaned. He’d spent longer in the library then he planned, finally getting back to his room after everyone else had already gone to bed.

 

Axel simply stayed quiet. In any other situation, this would have been hilarious. Axel was known for his smart and constantly running mouth and now all he could do was watch as Roxas finished off his ice cream.

 

“I guess I wanted to ask you if you had any memories of what romantic could mean? You said Nobodies have memories of who they were before they became Nobodies, but I don’t have any. I don’t think I could ask anyone else about this, they’d all laugh at me or tell me it’s nonsense.” Roxas looked out to the town, “So… do you know what romantic means Axel?”

 

Axel thought back to his past, what few memories of it there were still rattling in his head. He couldn’t specifically point out a ‘romantic’ memory per say but he felt like he knew enough to try and describe it to Roxas.

 

“Romantic is… it’s hard to explain because I think it’s different for every person since every person is different. Like you have to build it up for it to turn into the kind of love that people talk about all the time. Things like bringing someone their favorite kind of flowers just because you know they like them.”

 

Roxas looked to Axel, “Or buying them their favorite ice cream?”

 

Axel glanced to his friend, that tight feeling coming back strong in his chest, “Yeah, that can be seen as a romantic thing I guess. Sometimes people go on these things called dates, like to movies or to dinners at fancy restaurants because they like spending time and doing stuff together. That’s supposed to be romantic.”

 

“Can watching the sunset be considered a date?”

 

Axel suddenly became aware that Roxas was very close. Closer than he’d been when they first got here earlier in the afternoon. His chest was tight and painful, the palms of his hands sweaty. Roxas was looking at him, with those ocean blue eyes of his and _when did his face get so close?_

“Yeah… yeah it can be. Lots of people do it actually.” Axel said, and he swore he could feel Roxas’s breath on his face. The tips of his fingers grazed another's soft skin.

 

Axel lost his self restraint. Whatever question Roxas was going to ask him next, whatever pointless, meaningless question was lost on the smaller boy’s lips as Axel pressed his roughly against them. He grabbed Roxas by the collar of his black robe and pulled the blonde closer to him, kissing him hastily in the red light of the setting sun.

 

His hands moved to cradle his face and he noted just how soft Roxas’s skin was beneath his hands. He parted his lips just a bit, pressing another kiss to Roxas’s, softer this time. He felt Roxas’s lips part and he couldn’t help but dip in to taste him. Axel wondered if he’d taste just like he did in the dreams.

 

His mouth tasted sweet and a bit salty, just like the ice cream he’d just finished.

 

Axel honestly preferred it.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a birthday gift for my dearest buddy and pal SexiestSwine. Check her fics out.


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